Leadership...Hmm

Leadership is no easy task, especially for those who run our schools.  If your child is blessed to attend a good school stop by the pricinipals office to say "Hi", or write a note expressing your appreciation for their work behind the scenes.  A leader should enhance the character behind the institution he or she represents and push it forward to be even more.  The following is an excerpt from "Five Unconventional Characteristics of Effective Leaders"  written by Christian Muntean on July 23, 2013 for Beyond-Borders.com  Enjoy!  Have a wonderful day!

Unconventional Leadership Characteristics

Unconventional leaders are differenet because they actively engage these struggles. They cultivate the following personal characteristics:

• Courage: With courage, the right thing will be done even if it proves personally difficult for the leader. Courage is what propels a leader to take an unpopular, but right, stand. Courage is what enables good leaders to make decisions in times of uncertainty and ambiguity. Courage is what allows good leaders to acknowledge and grow from mistakes.

• Integrity: This means two things – one is honesty. A willingness to be known authentically. The other is a sense of ‘soundness’ or ‘solidness.’ Quotes, proposals, partnerships, product, services can all be trusted. Not because of good sales or websites – but because there is a consistency in quality and service.

• Stewardship: The core concept of stewardship is the deep understanding that “I don’t own all of this – I’m accountable to someone.” Even for the private business owner, your staff invest 40 of the best hours of their week for your business. Your customers have invested trust in you. Ethical leaders operate from a sense of stewardship and so they don’t just do whatever they want. They are aware that are responsible to others.

• Humility:  As referred to above, Jim Collins discovered the ‘difference that made the difference’ between consistently high performing organizations and all others was the presence of humility in leadership. Highly successful organizations had leaders who were experienced by others as personally humble but fiercely ambitious for the good of their organizations.  So, this isn’t head drooping, shoulder slumping, milquetoast humility. This was, essentially, a kind of humility that comes out of a person who says “I’m working for you.” As opposed to “You are working for me.”

• Care for Others: Ultimately, co-workers, staff, customers, clients, beneficiaries – all want to know that you actually care about them. The presence of that care allows an environment where people can flourish. The lack of it attracts people who, for lack of choice or unresolved personal issues are either willing to be abused or enjoy learning how to become abusers. Strong words – but a work environment where people don’t feel valued or cared for is essentially that. It is using people and people experience being used as abuse.

A Thought Experiment

Reflect back on the leader who has most frustrated or dissappointed you. How many of the above tendencies did they demonstrate? How many of the above characteristics? I'd be willing to wager that these negative leadership experiences were defined more by leaders who gave into tendencies then leaders who had forged their character. 

Now reflect on the leader you admire most. My guess is this individual probably demonstrated more of the above character traits as opposed to giving in to tendencies.

Character matters in a practical, functional way. It isn't just a question of preferance. As leaders - we lead out of who we are. We influence out of who we are. The more power or influence we have – the more of ‘who we are’ is magnified. That’s why it matters, as leaders, that we take seriously the cultivation of our character. Others depend on it.

- See more at: http://www.beyond-borders.com/articles/five-unconventional-characteristics-effective-leaders/#sthash.1Sf6QDbU.dpuf

Butterflies, Mommy!

 Last week my daughter was flipping through the channels and stumbled onto PBS.  A documentary about butter flies, how fitting.  Images of delicate Monarch butterflies were fluttering through the air.  Our whole family hunkered down onto the couch or found a chair.  Two of us were sprawled out on the floor.  Our two year old exclaimed, “Butterflies mommy!”  My husband was even enthralled.   Indeed, we were in awe.  From their beginnings as caterpillars to the chrysalis phase, to the wiggling out the journey of a butterfly is truly a phenomenon.    Their journey consists of over two thousand miles to reach their final destination.  Along the way they face weather difficulties, predators, and insecticides. The way they fly isn’t necessarily productive.  They tend to use more energy than stored to move.  Instinctively they wait on the wind so they can glide through the air.  On their journey they transformed the sky and even the trees when their destination was complete.   The orange and black of their wings on the trees was a peculiar yet beautiful sight.

The utter joy is in the struggle.  Children move and grow in spectacular ways.  Their newness allows each to be completely in the moment while also learning at the same time.   They begin their school careers innocently.  Each is a pallet waiting to be used as a beginning to create their future.  Some kids are eager, and willing to learn right away, others cannot stand the thought of being away from home.  The spectacular capabilities of children need to be drawn out of them.   An ideal school setting needs to enhance each child, highlight their strengths, and improve their weakness in a way that flows naturally.  When I think about such a transformation I think about a wonderful place called Monarch Montessori. 

I’m not going to go in depth about what a Montessori school is but I will however highlight the qualities of an excellent place for children to begin, learn, and grow.  The whole institution from the staff at the front desk, Joe the maintenance man, the administrators, teachers, and parents (with the encouragement from those listed above) operate with one focus; to support what pertains to children in school and at home, individually and socially.  I had the pleasure of speaking with some of the amazing staff at the school.  Over the next few days I will be sharing their hellos and why they chose their occupation.  Until tomorrow, have a wonderful day!

(The PBS special NOVA: Journey of the butterflies was used as a reference in this post.)

Hello #6...Finally!

"For this child I prayed and the Lord has granted me my petition."  1 Samuel 4:27

Childbirth is truly a miracle.  According to the CDC one in eight women has trouble getting pregnant or sustaining a pregnancy.  Carrying a growing child in the womb is truly a wonder. They begin the size of a pen dot and in 9 months grow into amazing little people, phenomenonal.  The desire to have children can be overwhelming.  I can remember starting to have an intense desire to have children in my late twenties.  The thought almost consumed me.  I had always wanted a family even a child.  It is something when a woman’s biological clock kicks into overdrive.  Having a deep desire to have children and not being able to can be unbearable.  This was the case for Amber.   After many tries for a total of eight years, five in vitro fertilization treatments, many pregnancy tests, and two miscarriages later she found out she was PREGOS…with twins! 

Can you imagine the elation and utter reserve in that?  Another pregnancy after two miscarriages, Amber was cautiously optimistic until she was well into her pregnancy.  Sadly seven weeks into her journey with her little people, only one heartbeat could be heard on the monitor.  As the reminder of past pain absorbed back into her body life was also growing there too.  She was ecstatic about finally carrying a little one but guilty about the loss.

The struggle to carry this baby continued.  She swelled a lot because of edema, was diagnosed with gestational diabetes and a slight case of preeclampsia.  With an induced labor at 37 weeks and three pushes later Jackson Adoniya was born.  She said the whole experience was surreal.  She looks at him and still can’t believe he belongs to her.  For Amber hello means the start of something new.  To all of those wanting children of their own and cannot, there is always hope.  These small bundles may not come idyllically the way one thought they might arrive.  However they get here, through the womb or by adoption oh the ride you'll be on when they finally get to you!  Have a wonderful day!

A Parent's Hello

Anyone with kids knows that every day brings something different; a lot of joy and sometimes, yes sometimes a “what was I thinking!?!”  Parenting, with all its many challenges is a call to persist.  When the day is almost done and we feel there is nothing else to give, daybreak comes and we gather the strength to do it all again.   Sometimes the day is mere joy; at other times chaotic.  Regardless of its triumphs and challenges the sunny smiles and cheesy grins of our children is an invitation to the unknown.  What are the thoughts behind their little faces?  What will their eyes see today?  How will we respond to the mystery of the many gifts a day brings?

Beautiful and unique, each one has a special way of touching our heart.  My oldest daughter is becoming a social butterfly.  Everyday the saga continues at school.  Her creativity makes me smile and her concern for others is delightful.  Our oldest son has a watchman’s eye.  He says the morning prayer over our family before school.  He continually reminds his oldest sister to put on her seatbelt.   He is diligent and chivalrous.  Lately he’s been a bit temperamental.  Our youngest son seems to have developed a complex.  He thinks he is too short.  Little does he know that when he does a cartwheel it takes my breath away because it is graceful and perfect.   The way he cares for his youngest sister is so delicate.  His laugh epitomizes glee.   Next, our second to the youngest daughter has middle child syndrome.  She wants to be the youngest.   Her eye for detail is amazing.  She has a unique ability to find anything that is lost in our house.  Her big brown eyes emerge and express her discovery before her mouth has said a word.  Finally our youngest, she is very aware of her position.  She is the last of the chubby cheeked munchkins we will experience.  If I could just get that girl to go to the potty without assistance it would be a miracle!  She knows how to go potty all by herself.  She just wants to take me with her when she goes.  It’s like a meeting in the Water Closet.  Turns out she just wants some company.  No one can say hello better than a child.

The Little People!

April is all about the kiddos.  I've been busy with my own...Yay!  I've also been busy interviewing for more posts concerning children...yay again!  I'm also collecting quotes from kids; they say the darndest things.  I Found this poem by Debra S. Higginbotham click below to view.  Captures the experience of little people precisely!  Have a wonderful day!


Messy Fingers, Children Poem

It all comes together...again

I posted this without the second paragragh! I guess it would be nice to know how things came together... I'll just stack it up to mommy brain and Have a wonderful day! (edited 4/13/15)

Amid the hustle of life it is easy to get sidetracked from what really matters.  We're so busy run, run, running that we forget about the things that count until we slam SMACK into the wall of reality.  Kids are great at making us wake up to what counts.  Yesterday in the rush of getting my boys to soccer practice I thought to myself,  "here we go again."  The youngest were  melting down were melting down...at the same time.  My oldest son was mad about something minor and didn't want to get in the van.  My youngest son was busy practicing his moves in the garage.  My oldest daughter was the only one who did what I asked.  Finally, after everyone was buckled into the van my two year old says, "Mommy, I need shoes!"  Ugh!  I run in, grab her shoes and we're off!  Burn baby burn!  Meanwhile inside the van I proceed to lecture the group about how we need to be more organized and be a team as I am zipping in and out of traffic   Blah, blah, blah is all they hear.  I can tell because they have that comatosed look on their faces; all except my youngest.  Her head is dangling at  an odd angle because she is sleeping.  We get to practice.  The boys pile out and I let out and exhale; made it!

 Later that day my oldest daughter made a friend with a girl who seemed rather shy.  She was picking flower blossoms and all my girls ran to meet her.  She offered them flowers.  They all seemed elated to play.  As the sun started setting, these new friends were running around the park searching for new adventures.  They were in and out of the huge pine trees and running up and down the grassy hills.  My boys were learning to work as a team. Their coach had made them pair up for drills.  At first their movements seemed akward.  More fast than slow their foot work became more fluid.  Their confidence in each other and their own ability emerged along with their smiling faces.  On the way home the van was silent.  Two of my kiddos were sleeping; two more were gazing out the window at the night lights going by, and the fifth was chattering all about the adventures she would have at the next practice.  With the click of the garage door opener we're home.  Each one slowly gets out of the car sleepy and hungry.  My husband carries two sleepy heads in.  I push the button on the wall to close the garage.  Every time this happens at the end of the day it always feels like a period on a sentence.  Made it.

It takes a village...

Happy Easter weekend to all of you!  He is RISEN!  It's Monday and we're baaaack!  We've dedicated April to all the little people we know and love. From the quirky things they say to all the beautiful gifts they possess there is NEVER a dull moment when they are around.  We will also share about what others see in our children when they are away from us by dedicating a whole week to some of the executive staff, teachers, and PTO of Monarch Montessori School of Denver.  What does it look like when people who share a passion for kids pour into their lives.  Why did they choose to work with kids?  What are some of the challenges our kids are facing away from home and what can parents do to improve their relationship with those who serve their kids everyday in some way?  These amazing people have stories too!  Have a wonderful day!